Did I really cry over a banana?

You already know that God has been speaking to me about my eating and love of food. My devotion for food had become too much in my life, and my lack of healthy habits was becoming a hindrance. 

Before I knew it, I found myself at a cafe the next day with The Mr. I was stuck. Stuck like a deer in headlights. I had no idea what to order, and though the little voice inside whispered, "Eat as natural as possible". My flesh was opposed. Not completely opposed, but that's the most dangerous kind. 

You see something that is obviously opposed to the truth causes a knee jerk reaction. We know better, right? It's those subtle hints of, "That's true, but..." that often gets us in trouble. 

So what did The Mrs do? I ordered something "healthy', but not at all what God was leading me to do. It was some sort of lentil walnut concoction with a bottled water and banana. Inside I knew that a banana would be enough to fill me up, but I craved more. 

I love to eat. When the Mr and I went to the food counter, we realized that my lentil concoction was not on the receipt. The cashier did not ring it up. Coincidence? Nope. I don't think so. 

The Mr. was quick to want to go back and order it for me, but I told him no. Instead I went to the table with my banana and bottled water. 

"Okay, Lord. I don't feel strong, but you promised me strength."

Tears came to my eyes. (How embarrassing, right?) We prayed over our meal, and I began to eat. My stomach was full. Believe it or not. However, my flesh was dying. That hurt. 

It wasn't just about the banana or the lentil walnut mash-up that I really didn't think I would like anyhow. It was about the dying of my will. It was about the surrender. Again, I say. That hurt. 

Soon the tears flooded out of my eyes and down my face. It was pitiful. 

However, God gave me the strength. I stopped there. Stomach filled, and flesh emptying itself. 

It was a good place to be. I couldn't see it at the moment, but The Mr helped me to understand. 

Thank you honey. 

At the end of the day, we all have our "food". For me, it's well...food. For The Mr it's something else, and for you it may be something else altogether. The key is to let God have it. Let God shape it for His glory. 

I think He is slowly taking our "food" and exchanging it for His. 

John 4:34

"My food," said Jesus, "is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work.